"I'm not jealous."

I’m sure it’s happened to you, it’s happened to all of us. You’ve lost your job, your lover, a friend, been passed over for a promotion, or didn’t get that role. Then someone comes along, either the one who has “stolen” this elusive happiness from you, or someone connected to them- and they rub it in your face. At least, this is how we perceive it during the “mourning” period. A direct attack on us- On our abilities, our intelligence, our beauty, our self worth. How rude. When this occurs the first thing that goes through most people’s minds (right after, “I’ll kill a bitch….”) is something along the lines of “show no weakness! I can’t let them know I’m jealous…or hurt…or upset at all.” It is human nature to have weakness, but it is also human nature to not want to show it. So what do we do? We pretend to be better off than we are. We lie. We do everything we can to say “I’m not jealous.” The funny part is, we all do it, so it isn’t as if we are getting away with anything. In the end, the mere act of responding to whatever passing comment (or in this day and age, “posting” on a social networking site…) proves to the other party that we are in fact jealous, or hurt, or upset at all. However, we are human- we care, we have weakness, and we try our damnedest not to show it. So who is going to fault us for this? No one. We know when someone is trying to make us jealous, just as know when we are trying to make someone else jealous. Sometimes it feels good to win. We also know when we have hurt someone, just as they know when they have hurt us. So there is no shame in pretending to be better off than we are. No shame in only discussing the “positive, happy” aspects of our lives through the pain. “Proving” our strength to the other party, in fact, assists us in proving our strength to ourselves. In the end, we are all stronger than we think we are.

jack N box